ARDEN'S BIRTH STORY - I am Tarryn Donaldson

Today is Arden’s 2nd birthday, and while I sit here reminiscing and getting all sentimental about the day he was born, looking back through all the photos and seeing the emotions of that day and watch it unfold again I thought why not do a blog post about it. Then I can pop onto the blog and reminisce any day of the year.

I will post the video of his birth further down so if you don’t want me to bore you with all the details grab a box of tissues and keep scrolling!

It all started at 2am on the 14th March 2014, my due date. I kept waking up and going to the toilet, but didn’t need to pee. It took me a while to realize that the reason why I was waking up frequently was due to the tightenings I was feeling. It was magical. I loved every single one (at this stage). With Kylan I was induced at 14 days over due and literally got thrown into the deep end of full blown labour without any easing into it. Waking up to these gentle enjoyable contractions was amazing. I didn’t get much sleep after that due to the excitement more than anything and text my mum and dad at 5am asking them to work from home that day as I thought I was in labour.

Ryan didn’t seem phased when I woke him to tell him, typical he just rolled over and went back to sleep. They were about 4 minutes apart and lasting about 20 seconds.

That morning I got up, showered and organized and took one last bump selfie of my fully cooked belly.

I drove Kylan to school and soon realized I shouldn’t be driving as the contractions although mild were definitely there and hard to deal with whilst driving. I walked Kylan to the classroom and advised the teacher that I was in labour so he may be collected early today from school by someone at some point. I got home and called my mum to come over and give me a hand. Our fridge had broken that week so the day before we had bought a new one and had left it to cool overnight so I was transferring all our food over to the new fridge between contractions. I also had someone wanting to come and buy kylans old bed that morning, so they too arrived and had to deal with me in between my contractions…but I had ticked off two of my things on my to do list. I had not anticipated Arden coming on his due date. After being so overdue with Kylan I had so much stuff still planned to get done thinking I had at least another week or two up my sleeves! I had only just finished painting the fence outside the day before.

I had my weekly midwife appointment at 11am so my mum took me to that and the contractions were now getting a little more painful esspecially when sitting in a car! We got there, I had my biggest one yet in the waiting room and the receptionist went and told my midwife and they got me strapped up to the machine to see what was going on… and they just stopped! Not even a wee mild one! Murphy’s law they had completely stopped!

I told my midwife I wasn’t lying and I really was in labour! She examined me and found that I was 3cm dilated. She did a stretch and sweep and sent me on my way jokingly saying that ideally now I would walk around for a few hours and things would get going, give her a call at 1pm, hopefully by then things will be in full swing and by 3 we should head to the hospital, get my waters broken and have a baby by 7pm so she can go home and have dinner with her family!

I had on my to do list to go and buy some more foundation as mine had just run out so we went off to the mall. I didn’t want an ugly face in all my photos of me and my beautiful new baby!! While we were there I decided to drop my rings off at the jeweller to get cleaned too (as you do). We stopped and had some lunch as with Kylan I remember eating before hand and vomiting it all up as the contractions were too strong too fast so I wanted to get a good meal in me to fuel me through this labour as I knew I probably wouldn’t be eating again until after and I hadn’t had breakfast yet. I had the yummiest corn fritters and grunted my way through them, stopping for each contraction. By now things were heating up and I could tell I was embarrassing my mum walking through the mall and stopping every 5 mins in an obvious state of pain so we decided to head back home. In our rush out of there I completely forgot about my rings! Did I mention how much it sucks labouring in a car!! Seriously the worst position to be having contractions in… that car ride home was not fun (and mums car is a tiny swift so no room for movement!)

We went home and I had one more major job that had to be done today. Our mortgage fixed term rate had come off and I needed to refix. So I phoned the bank, advised them to please excuse the horrible noises and lack of conversation every 5 minutes as I was in the process of bringing new life into the world and we discussed our rates for about half an hour and got all of that sorted!

Then my bowels decided to do their thing (sorry TMI) and naturally clear the system before the baby comes! Thank goodness as nobody wants to be pooing on a table in front of everyone!! The midwofe happened to ring whilst I was busy doing that and when my mum told her she got worried thinking I would be having a baby on the toilet so she got us to head into the hospital ASAP.

We picked Kylan up from school. It was a bit chaotic as his kindy teachers were all up visiting so when I walked in they were all like “hey how are you when’s this baby coming” and I was like “NOW, Kylan lets go!!!!!!”

We dropped Kylan off with my dad where he wasn’t too happy to be left as he could see I was in pain and his little face was filled with worry and concern for me, and headed into north shore hospital….another really crappy experience in the car!!!

Now I should probably mention that the only date that both my sister and my birth photographer weren’t going to be able to make the birth was my due date, I didn’t really worry about it that much as its only about 7% of babies actually come on their due dates…so what are my chances!! So my sister was shopping in Ozzie and my birth photographer was stuck in the Cook Islands due to the cyclone!

I text her back up photographer when we were on our way to the hospital and she headed in too!

I wanted to have my husband and mum in the room so that if hubby needed a break and a de stress he could leave me with my mum and vice versa. Amy (my sister) was getting text updates the whole way through the process.

We got to the hospital and we were walking in and I suddlenly realized I had left my wedding rings at the mall. I got a bit panicked by this for some reason so I called them and told them someone else would pick them up for me as I was in labour and had to rush off. Okay that was sorted so we continued up to the ward and got all singed in. My midwife met us there and didn’t waste time to break my waters which really got things moving a lot quicker!

We all laughed and joked through this stage of my labour, hubby lovingly looking after the gas for me in between contractions and had us all it fits of laughter. The midwife kept saying she will pretend she didn’t see that! Even mum had a turn on the gas (after baby was born) and it was the funniest thing you have ever seen!! the Midwife was even encouraging her to give it a go.

I was worried about having a stranger (photographer) in the room with me but it was perfectly fine. I heard the trigger clicks for the first few minutes and then I became oblivious to it all. She knew when to chat and when to stay quiet, she knew when to step out of the room and give us some privacy and she was like a fly on the wall most of the time.

Things moved quickly and before long it was all unbearable and I asked for some drugs, typical though when you want them you want them then and there! But they have to take your blood and get you checked and that all takes an hour! By the time the anethatist arrived to my room my midwife looked at me, said she thinks it’s too late, am I able to sit still for it, I knew I wasn’t going to be able to sit still so I had to turn the man with the magic medicine away and that’s when I got scared knowing I was in this now and it was going to hurt like all shit till the end!

During my pregnancy I suffered form terrible pelvic joint pain. Pain so bad that I would try get out of bed and collapse as my legs wouldn’t hold me the pain was too much. The only way I got through the pregnancy was with my smiley belt which I wore every single day. This pain eased off over the last few weeks at the end of my pregnancy but decided to show its ugly face again with every single contraction. So not only did I have painful contractions in the front I also had a searing pain in my lower back with every one. It was not fun!

I remember my midwives words clearly as I was going through transition. She could tell I was struggling and she looked me in the eyes and said “now it’s going to feel like you are going to die, but you aren’t! Just remember that you aren’t!” That scared me but also got me refocused. Time came to push and the pushing hurt my lower back like crazy. I remember her telling me to listen to her and stop and breathe when she said so but the pain was just too much that I just pushed and pushed and Arden came out fast! He caused a bit of damage along the way due to me not listening but I needed him out and I needed that pain to stop! I had to apologize to the midwife afterwards, I told her “I’m sorry I didn’t listen, I could hear her but my body just wouldn’t let me stop!”

And then he was here!

A gorgeous 9 pound perfect little bundle that looked exactly like Kylan did at birth it was scary! I was in so much pain after that 9 pound ball came tearing into the world (pun intended) that it looks like I have tears of joy on my face in the video but I have tears of burning vagina on my face!!

These photos mean the world to me. I am always the one behind the lens. And with Kylan I don’t have very many photos of him being born or afterwards and the ones I do have aren’t the least bit flattering. Knowing my sister could potentially not make it as she was going to be my camera lady I looked into birth photography options. I went with the lovely Keri-Anne from First Light Photography and I ended up with her lovely back up photographer Liz and she did an amazing job. These ones where Kylan came to meet his baby brother mean the most to me. Look at that face!!